A bit ago, I made a bold choice. I was going to fly home to Michigan with both kids and only myself. I had a few extra vacation days and once I landed Gramma and Padre would be there to help out. The biggest stress was the flight itself.
At this age, Isabel and Connor are actually very good flyers. Isabel happily watches Daniel Tiger, Tumbleleaf, or a movie on an iPad with headphones and Connor mostly sits in his carseat and sleeps. So I had some degree of confidence I could do this.
I checked everything I could the morning of the flight so i’d have as many free hands as possible to deal with the kids. Smart!
The flight is going splendid and then Isabel has to go potty. Oh crap…do i try to take both kids? Do I leave CPK in the seat alone? (What if someone kidnaps him??) Do I tell Isabel that she just has to hold it? Fortunately, I talked about this with Jake beforehand. His advice was to have someone sitting nearby watch Connor while I took Isabel to the bathroom. Easy.
Isabel: Dadda, i have to go potty.
Me: Great. Okay. let’s get unbuckled. (Makes eye contact with older woman on the aisle seat across from us). Hey. Watch this kid please. He doesn’t move too much so it should be easy. thanks.
Old lady: What?
Me: Please just watch him. His name is Connor
Old Lady: Ummm…okay. (Clearly disapproving of my parenting style)
When we return…
Old Lady: His mouth thing fell out. (she means pacifier)
Me: Great. Thanks.
Timing wise, it’s time for connor to eat. Lucky for me, he just got his NG tube a few weeks prior so he doesn’t even have to get out of his car seat. He takes about 1-2 ounces by mouth and then i give him the rest by tube. I am crushing parenting. We are almost to Michigan.
Ding. The final descent. Dad Life! Nailing it! Go Tom! Go Kleinmahons!
Connor starts fussing so i take him out of his seat and sit him in my lap, which is allowed because he’s less then 2 years old. No problem, I’ll just hold him in my lap for the rest of the flight. Still winning.
Ding. Seat belts on for the remainder of the flight. We are gonna make it…”this was so easy” i stupidly think to myself.
That’s when connor starts to cough. Then a wet sounding cough, which gives me about 10 seconds to prepare. I grab for his bib and burp cloth. Being overly organized I had velcroed them onto the car seat so i wouldn’t lose them. Valuable seconds tick away as I try to free them using one hand while holding connor with the other. tick tock tick tock. More coughing from Connor. Here it comes, he’s gonna spit up. I manage to free the burp cloth just in time and “catch” his spit up. Now i’m holding connor in my lap with one hand and a rag with a pool of formula in the other. Slowly it seeps through the fabric and starts dripping on my leg. Great. I have no hands free to open the motion sickness bag and no adults nearby to help. Drip. Drip. Drip. I shift around and put connor back into his carseat (with minimal spillage) and get the motion sickness bag open. I stuff the completely soaked burp cloth inside and assess the situation…
Isabel is still happily watching a movie, Connor is smiling at me, my right leg is very wet and i smell like a protein shake. two out of three aint bad. To make it all better, we are in our final descent so i can’t even get up to clean off…I get to ride out the last 10 minutes or so in this amazing state.
Thanksfully, Gramma and Padre are at the airport to save the day. I wash my hands and clean off my pants and it’s straight to GGBs for a visit.
